B&A, How is this for a begining to a story?

I am one of those teenagers who don't know much, all I can say it's like it was written by a real writer. Genuinely interested.

Would it be inappropriate to write about my romance novel for my college essay?

I agree with S.K. Plus, most people reading this are automatically going to think of the 'Twilight' series simply because of the similarity in the character names and because it appears to be about forbidden love. That instant connection, fair or not, will connect a college essay to a young adult novel, and the writer of that college essay to a much younger girl. There are so many basic writing problems here that I would suggest having someone edit this for you long before you make any attempts to use it for anything other than your own enjoyment. S.K. listed some, but as a specific example, most people can't sob and speak at the same time. You would write that part with a simple 'she said' dialog tag, and then show her sobbing through body language and interaction with the character. This isn't to say don't write, just that you don't appear to be ready to submit to a college for something as important as an essay. Keep writing, having fun with your story, and learning the craft, but find something else for your college essay. Good luck.

Have you ever secretly re-programmed your office air conditioning?

..on a Friday night because it was too hot, then come in on a stormy Monday morning to see everyone wrapped in jumpers

Question about probation ?

whats the minumun amout of time a minor will stay in jail , if she breaks probation . ( example : drinking & out past curfew)

What is a quick way to raise $200?

My boyfriend is in jail, my car is towed. I'm desperately in a financial crisis. What's a way to earn quick cash!?

Help please. shoplifting at age 18?

okay I shoplifted a month ago.. and my court is in a few days. i was with minor friends and im 18. we admit that we kinda planned it.i went to jail and got bailed from 25,000 dollars. so please, help. i do not know anything or what to do or say in court. its my first offence so please tell me everything step by step. and the things that i stole in total was 50 dollars

Is a jail required to give you your meds such as those for epilepsy?

when i was arrested they would not give me either of my scrips while i was in incarseration. witch resulted in me having seizures. to witch i was also denied medical attention. when i was arrested in the first place i was involved in an accident on a motorcycle i was bleeding everywhere they said i was traveling over 100 mph. but when the ambulance showed up the cops sent them away.i was then taken strait to jail. upon our arrival at the jail a seargent asked the arresting officer what i was doing there and to take me to the hospital for xrays after geting there he told the doctors i didnt need any and promptly returned me to the jail,and while i was there they denied me of my seizure medications. my question is, is there a law that requires them to have a doctor see me before they put me in a cell? and is there any laws that say they have to give me my meds while im in custody when in fact they are aware of the fact i do have to take them.